dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
I filled this oven with as much Pizza as I could, and I've been eating out of it for three days.
Just ate the last piece. Refilling the oven.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
you are singlehandedly the most cursed object the universe ever conceived
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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