so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
I saw the video from Saturday. So, how much did I drink for me to think I was a duck and strip my clothes?
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
btw...it's noon and i'm sitting here drinking wine and eating pixie stix. I really need to find something to do...
Randomize
