How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Omg. I definitely just got hit on by my doctor AFTER he completed my pap smear which clearly showed I was in the middle of an outbreak. What. The. Fuck.
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
Randomize
