playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
That would warm my breasts.
In this context breast is a metaphor for soul.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Trust me, I'm a professional lesbian.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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