why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
He promised he'd be the first bidder on my ebay item if i went home with him. Worth it.
I walk in and my mom takes one look at me and just says, ".... Consequences"
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
He was just lying on my lap in the backseat screaming how if the cops came he was a blanket.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
It will be too late. I will have fornicated with the enemy by then.
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
You coming to give me head and eat tacos?
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
