Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
I could tell you were slightly drunk by the time you started having a conversation with my tiki torch
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
