Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
conquered wheelchair sex. it's rather convenient. you'd think it was made for it, with all those handles and adjustable features.
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
Worst hangover of my career vs the return of the blue balls. Will keep updated
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
You didn't try to help me when I fell on the dance floor. She brought me cupcakes. You're a shitty friend, suck your own dick.
I gave a very stressed out cashier a mini bottle from my purse the day after Christmas. It's what Jesus would have done.
You're a good person. Sharing is caring.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
and then you proceeded to throw soup at him for calling you a bitch...a CAN of soup...
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