FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
I can see your house from here
Get off of his fucking roof
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
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