ID DO HER
SHE HAS LUMPS OF DEODORANT IN HER ARMPIT, I THINK ONE FELL IN YOUR DRINK
so today I found out that she used to be a he....
are you gonna get a divorce?
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
I feel like i got beat with a pillowcase full of tequila shots.
I do have sympathy for you. It's just not going to manifest as a blow job.
Don't worry that pussy is fresh, I'd brush my teeth with it.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
It's gay softball weekend. Lots of hot gay strangers to go home with.
Your fuck buddy is making you watch the OC. I think that counts as strings attached.
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
So I'm at early voting and the group of ladies behind me is talking about voting no on 2 and my gummy is kicking in, thank lawd
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
MY TITS JUST CAUSED A CAR ACCIDENT ON THE HIGHWAY! i kid you not!! i thinl the giy is actually dead
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
