is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
walked right past julianne moore (on her walk of shame this morning) god i love new york. :)
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
Well I woke up with a note on me reading Dear Passed Out Girl, and ending with why I shouldn't drink so much. Damn Tequilla.
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Randomize
