Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I got a free corona t-shirt and all I had to do was drink a beer. This needs to be a more widely accepted form of currency.
Randomize
