when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
All I know is I woke up next to her beside the toilet
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
So I passed out with my boxers on in the hotel jacuzzi at 5am.. The manager who kicked me out was pretty cute so I left my name and number for her at the front desk. I'm giving it a 50/50 she calls.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
she broke a 50 dollar bottle of alcohol. then passed out in front of her car and got sprayed by a skunk
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
Randomize