he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
When he was fingering me, it felt/looked like he was digging around for pocket change.
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I made it crystal clear I'm only upset because he's not anywhere fit to be a father of my unborn zygote
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
You're going to find someone that you love very much and that loves you, and then you're gonna find an additional person that you literally can't stop staring at from across the room. I feel very confidently about that
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
