We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
You need to get here now. A drunk girl just stumbled into our apartment. shes laying on the floor by our door.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
i walked outside and you were driving up the stairs to her apartment
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
I've seen you dance and let's just say its a good thing you don't have a small dick
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
Well, he didn't buy me a birthday present but he sure did give me chlamydia so there's that.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
