I must be too annoying 4 u.
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Spotify says I’m in the top 1% of Indigo Girls fans worldwide. Didn’t know I would peak this early.
Aren’t you trying to seem...less lesbian?
Randomize
