well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
I'm currently drunk proofing my room
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
But we have bathrooms and they dont
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