i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
And dildos are 35% off. So. Ya know. Savings.
This guy on the bus keeps leaning over and sniffing my hair.
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I am in serious pain and you're making dick jokes. I hope you wind up with crotch rot.
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Randomize
