Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
You were Q-tipping mashed potatoes out of your ear.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
We're drinking vodka. Wine is for people who have to wake up in the morning.
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
His reasoning for leaving the keys in the ignition of my car overnight with the top down in an open parking lot ? Too eager to have sex. The sex was not that good for him to do this twice....
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Right now, I'm sitting in my room, drinking beer, eating double stuff Oreos, taking bites straight from a block of cheese, and watching Anchor Man 2 trailers. Finals week at its finest
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
My apologies. I'll try not to let my dick interfere with official work duties in the future.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Randomize
