Forgive me I'm always horny when I wake up
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
this cock blocking thing really has to end bro...its one thing to tell jen i live with my mom.. its another to cut the brakes on my car..
Be there soon... with munchies, blow jobs and shoulder rubs.
he wouldn't lick chocolate syrup off of me because he's vegan. most awkward shower ever.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Randomize
