hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
How do you know one of your one night stands hasn't produced a child? You may have hundreds of kids.
Pretty sure I don't. One night stands are purely anal..no exceptions.
At this point, I would light birthday candles in my vagina for free drinks
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
of course he's cheating on me, she's 100x prettier and she can do the splits
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Come on, will you just fuck him so we can watch Star Wars.
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I thought the first time I got peed on it would be by a baby...
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
Randomize
