i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
her vagina looked like bernie madoff
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
I only want to make out with him. Unless I get hungry. In that case I will take him home and screw him as a distraction from eating.
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Randomize
