wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
you had me at cake vodka
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
I have feelings that need drinking.
you never keep up with shots anymore
I'm trying to be more responsible these days
you fucking tried to take your pants off and pee in Taco Bell's parking lot
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize
