I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
He somehow pantsed the bouncer and tipped him over before cartwheeling and skipping away? Help me find him.
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
Randomize
