mark looks like s**t tonight! thank da lawd we broke up!
it's mark...i'm guessing you didn't mean to send that to me...
seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
A nap. You broke your hand napping in Vegas.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
5 hours of volunteer work playing with puppies and banned from the frat I hate most as 'punishment'... Besides the ER trip, I'm not seeing the bad in this situation
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
If the people you’re with use the word tequila in a sentence with phrases like hair of the dog or breakfast of champions...run awsy
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