But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
The timing couldn't have been better if I planned it. His mom walked away, I vomited in their mulch, and then his mom came back and offered me bread.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
Who the fuck did i sell my right shoe to last night i need to get that back im not walking with one shoe on
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I have nothing to say other than the obvious 'we probably shouldn't have done that' and the less obvious 'i think you bruised my labia major' ...?
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
All I know is I woke up cuddling a jar of peanut butter....
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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