you better believe me or I'll punch you in the face
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
Ugh..Yesterday was a complete alcohol fueled shit show. Not making eye contact with anyone today. Don't deserve it. Eye contact is for decent people.
I'm wearing a suit and have no chance of getting laid or robing a casino. I consider this opportunity a failure
You don't know reunion panic until you've exfoliated your butt cheeks.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
Randomize
