I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
I ended up taking shots of whiskey and chasing them with potato wedges, I have never felt more Irish
I'm hoping he'll tell everyone how great in bed I am. Well, how great in bathroom floor I am.
God and karma are having a fucking field day with my body today.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
You made her yell her own name while you were fucking so that you would remember it in the morning.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Not sure how my purse ended up in the bushes last night... Or why there was a noodle strainer in the toilet.
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