IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
CUNT. CUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUNT
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
We found you passed out clutching your purse. There was 16oz of unopened cheddar cheese inside. You just kept saying SALSA YES.
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
Exactly. So he deserves crazy "thanks for keeping me out of jail" sex. Or an "I'm glad your excessive cocaine habit had some positive outcomes" blowjob.
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
Are you around on Saturday? Feeling a trip over
Wet with either fear or sexual excitement
I think a mixture of both is appropriate
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
I want a musical about memes.
Randomize
