what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
He gets you donuts, dinner, and booze consistently, who cares if he's cheating
I don't know if it's the amount i drank last night or the number of taylor swift statuses on facebook but i feel like puking everywhere
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
I will feel awake by 6 pm
Are we not meeting until 6?
No I'm just saying thats usually when my body knows it's time to party
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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