I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
theres gunna be a new season of 16 and pregnant on mtv...WHERE DO THEY KEEP FINDING THESE IGNORANT PREGNANT GIRLS
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
We should install the 'help i've fallen and can't get up' buttons on our bodies for this weekend. Birthday weekend calls for extra measures.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
OMG WE ARE UP TO THREE MINORS WORKING HERE. I AM NOT READY FOR THIS MID LIFE CRISIS.
Randomize