I'm surrounded by dudes and fupa's! No hot chicks...wtf!?
Medical industry, most hot chicks dont want to deal with blood + shit
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
After you bought Jesus' name tag off him at the Mexican restaurant you commenced to stumbling around the lobby showing anybody who would listen what would Jesus do.
Stop giving me tequila.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
How's my sex life is me mastubating next to her dog. that's how it's going.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
