Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
You know me. im down for anything that could harm my well being. lets dress like dolphins so everyone will see what dicks they are.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I started a USA chant at the bar last night for no reason, other than being plastered. Within 15 seconds, I was standing on a table and the whole bar was chanting but nobody knew why.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
The way I see it, there's 2 types of friends. Those you should do drugs with, and those you really,really shouldn't.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
Stumbled out of my bed this morning into the bathroom at 8 am still drunk, obviously. The Mormon on my floor was in the bathroom. I could practically hear her doing hail marys for me.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
