We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I'm dreading the fact that when the dominoes guy comes, he will ask me if i placed an order under the name "high as shit".
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
thats what you get for writing a paper after liquor pitchers
its only a rough draft.
Annd you probably wouldn't of fallen down the stairs if you didn't insist on taking 'finale shots'
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
There a special place in hell for drunk criers. A special FUCKING PLACE
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I also know you puked in your shoe.
That would explain the note .... I apparently wrote myself an apology note from drunk to sober me .... saying "sorry for the fancy shoe soup" .... ugh I'll never drink again ...
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
A piece of your chipped nail polish just fell out of my crotch.
Randomize