If you want to dance with a less than stellar Asian chick, I have just the girl for you.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
WERE YOU GOING TO TELL ME THERE WAS A LOAF OF BANANA BREAD IN THE OVEN BEFORE YOU LEFT FOR A 5 HOUR SHIFT??
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
They set the pop up pool in the basement-running filter and all. Drunk swimming. Come now.
Make me a sandwich
The day you make me feel like my detachable showerhead does I'll make you a sandwich.
I'm hoping my engineering degree will pay off when I invent porn watching in the shower
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
Randomize
