Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
tonight is going to be epic. can you pre-book an ambulance?
its a long story involving jim bean, an owl, and a knife
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
Depending on which video of him streaking you watch, you can see me passed out in the front row.
it still weirds me out that Robin Thicke is Alan Thicke's son
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Let’s be real here. NOTHING says Real Adulting like rolling a J on your line of credit paperwork.
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