i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
Operation Purity has been aborted
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Shaving my legs with an ankle monitor on is surprisingly more difficult than the drunk driving that got me here
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
This is why I should’ve just stuck with blow jobs. I’m good at blow jobs. Blow jobs never fail me.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
