Where are you?
In a non slutty way
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
You get to be the grown up. Leave a ciabatta by his face.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Just threw up in the trash can at my desk. I guess "beating the hangover" eventually leads to this.
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Did he at least walk u home
He offered. I dont like that shit. I want his dick not his presence on my walk home
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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