Have fun fixing the bed from last night Bob Villa.
At least you didn't call me Brittany this time
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
I don't know where I am, but its a Goosebumps novel waiting to happen.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Let's be honest dude, you almost cried when I gave you a handy, you are not ready for a relationship, I knew this.
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
So what's the protocol on sending your exes new wife a baby shower gift that says "thanks for getting him the hell out of my life, please keep him there!"?
So... I sharted on the plane. It was hard to maintain my composure and acted offended at the same time. I hate you for not cutting me off last night.
Randomize
