Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
i can't believe i had my finger in that
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
I miss seeing you
i hope for the sake of your safety you were not with your girlfriend while sending texts like that at 3 am
Wait... where the hell did you even find a live OCTOPUS, let alone green eggs and ham?
Randomize
