If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Walked in on my boss having phone sex at work... and somehow this didnt bother nor embaress him
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Imagine getting smashed in the dick by a basketball. A basketball made of metal. With spikes. That's pretty much what his dick looked like.
The worst that could happen is you end up with a black eye and I get laid.. I'm okay with my end of that bargain.
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I feel like I'm going to shit out a Big Mac
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
I am so dumb. I made a mistake and let him get away.
Don't worry, there are other penises in the sea.
Thanks, mom.
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