this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
I was more concerned about the amount of mcdonalds fries on the floor around me than i was with my lack of clothes.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
You haven't lived until you've thrown up naked in a hotel room in Fargo while holding your breasts so they don't touch the toilet bowl.
A homeless man just offered me vodka. The power it took to deny it deserves an award.
He? As in you personified your dick?
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
You don't get to call me bro after you've had your dick in me.
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Randomize
