HIV tests are more positive than that guy
so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
I'm serious. My alarm label is "BAR TABS" as motivation for me to wake up in the morning and go to work.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
the liver wants what the liver wants
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
Randomize
