There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
was just hit on by a homeless lesbian. forever alone.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
when i got there he was on top of an air mattress in the middle of the pool with a bag of doritos and a 40 telling people he needed his space.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
There are flashing lights and a man dressed as Santa with a bullhorn in my cul de sac.
I'm not sure if this is awesome or scary.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
Found your counterpart from cali. Walked into the bar we were in with milk and a donut, ordered a beer and said anything his group wanted was on his tab....dangerous
It's hard to hold down the snapchat button for video while thrusting. Sorry if the cinematography wasn't Oscar-worthy.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Never play truth or dare with a girl who carries a dildo in her purse. I'll never go to a Denny's again.
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
Randomize