Why does every girl think its ok to cheat on their boyfriends with me?
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
haha I love it when I find out that girls who were mean to me in middle school are now some random dude's baby mama. thanks, facebook.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
This is the third year in a row that Mario has fallen through a table on New Years. I'm sensing a tradition developing.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Ps can u get with my cousin? He's a freshman at uconn and he's very attractive but like were related....
Randomize
