He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
Ramen noodles and uncensored jerry springer episodes, what a nice life i have.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
How’s the date going?? Do you think he’s gonna cut your face off and wear it to his birthday party?
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
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