I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Little spoons don't ask big questions
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
"Like what guy would respond to 'let's fuck. I've got bagels'??"
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
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