I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
The cops showed up and one of them got pushed in the pool. When he got out he looked really sad so I got him a towel and hugged him. He arrested all the underage drunkards but me.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
Do you remember last night?
Just that I fell down a hill with my penis out and the emt talked to me.
I went looking for them and I pulled my pants down and peed on the lawn. I found my phone in the same spot in the morning.
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
