ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
i don't know how it's possible. but i just bought groceries for a week with the money i made off returning empties
You never did explain why you were in wal-mart with a wok full of popcorn.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
When you are old and getting humped by saggy balls every other weekend you are gonna wish you had more sex with freshly legal boys. Your vagina will thank you one day. Don't let her down.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
I had sex in an engineering office last night. So that could be your life. I was mounted on top of a sketch of a future parking lot for a maintenance building. If that's not romantic, idk what is
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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