Just spent 3 hours on the Mcdonalds website. I don't know what to do with myself now that college is over.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
We decided to leave the bar after we shattered a glassand then drive to steal a baby pool for our water festivities tomorrow
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
I remember puking but I don't remember where. PSA: don't go barefoot around the house
I'm literally beginning to think that my sex dreams are prophesies
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
