is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
I don't even know how sober sex starts anymore
You had sex with him even after he literally described himself as a "coldplay guy"? There's a line you just don't cross. There is a line.
Ironically her ferret's toys look like her sex toys.....this is a whole new level of kinky for me
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
You filled up my voicemail with a slurred but graphic depiction of how you were humping a fire hydrant.
Just had a handjob preempted by a huge bolt of static electricity leaping from her fingertip to my sack. I hate this time of year.
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
And then my night got REAL pukey
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
a guy messaged me on POF to ask if I knew of any places that were hiring. And was being completely deadass serious. I'm so done
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
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