all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
just bought 2000 rhinestones and a heart shaped stencil at Micheals...I think the cashier knows i'm Vajazzling
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
So I fucked a guy with his mouth wired shut last night never thought id cross that off my imaginary bucket list
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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